!Questions Answered!

This is the place, the one your mother warned you about. The place where the questions are answered. It is my guarantee that I will answer any question asked or provide you with a full-money-back refund. So ask away. Post any question you might have here, and I shall answer it when I get around to it as is my want.

Question for You

Does anyone know the true etymology of the word "hobo?" Dictionary.com, the most reputable source that I can think of, said it was from the term "hoe boy," because they carried their own hoes, for fighting and casting hobo spells, one would suppose. My friend, however, told me that his history teacher told him that it was because they were "homeward bound," much like the animals in the film by the same name. Speaking of which, I must go...

Dead Sea Scrolls?

Elvira said...
Is you blog, "Necronauticon," in any way related to the "Dead Sea Scrolls" that I have heard so much about?

Sheldorama said...
No. The "Dead Sea Scrolls" of which you speak are a set of Ancient Hebrew scrolls found in caves near the Dead Sea. You can read more about them here. Though my blog has a similar name, roughly translating to "dead water book," it is pretty much unrelated. Verily, the Dead Sea Scrolls contain portions of the Hebrew Bible, which is the foundation of many of the world's most famous and popular religions. My writing, on the other hand, is, for the most part, universally mocked or ignored, and rightly so.

My Proportions

your cousin said...
Is your waist really 32? I thought it was 30. Because an inseam of 34 doesn't sound so freakishly long if your waist is 32. I see 32-34 jeans all the time. 30-34 though. That would be something!


Sheldorama said...
Ah, good question. Here's the deal: If I wear a 30' the pants will ride around my actual waist and thus necessitate an even longer length. If I wear a 32-34 with a belt, which is the closest thing that I can find to a reasonable fit, then my pants ride on my hips and only require 34 inches of length. This also keeps me from appearing so high-waisted like so many Cosmo Kramers. I'm actually probably about a 30-35 or 36.

p.s. I'm not getting fat! You are!

Liquid Versus Gas

-J said...
Hey Mr. Sheldon, what is the difference between liquid and gas? And why is the air not considered by most to be as disturbing as the sea?

Thanks

Firstly: This is not a comment. Well actually that was a comment. What you wrote was not a comment. It wasn't even a question. It was TWO questions. It still is two questions. How could two questions possibly be handled in the comments section? And then there were three... And thus the question and answer page was born.
Secondly: To answer your first question, let us consider the ancient Greeks. The ancient Greeks created the original periodic table of the elements. This table was much simpler and easier to remember. It looked like this.
fire
------
air
------
water
------
earth
As you may have noticed each of the elements is named after one of the planeteers from the original Captain Planet, which in ancient Greece was performed as a series of plays. Anyways, as the diagram illustrates, the elements stacked neatly atop each other. Smokes rises, so fire goes on top. Rocks sink, so earth goes on the bottom, etc. You may be wondering what this has to do with liquids and gases. If you spoke ancient Greek, you would already understand. The word air is Greek for gas. As you have likely guessed, the word water means liquid.
Another difference comes from after the ancient Greeks, sometime near the year zero. It is recorded in the Bible that Jesus walks on both land (earth) and water (liquid), but never on air (gas) or fire (?). Yet another difference between the two. With the help of Jesus, it is easy to tell the difference between the two. If Jesus, however, is not willing to help you with your little science project, a common cork will suffice. A cork will sit on earth, float in water, fall in air, and burn in fire.
Thirdly: I thought that I had covered this pretty well in my original post. Here's the deal. Air is way less gross than water because it is less dense (This means it is higher on the table of the elements.). When a land animal makes waste, the waste falls harmlessly to the ground and is eventually washed into the sea. When a sea animal does its business the waste just floats around with it perpetually (Gross!). In a similar manner, when a land animal dies its carcass decomposes in an isolated, easily avoidable area. Whereas when a sea creature dies its remains float around all haphazard-like. (Exactly equally gross.)

I hope that this answers your questions.